Wish are just that wishes

It's been a while since I have posted any wishes. It's nice writing down what my wishes are as it's like tying a balloon to it and sending it out. Sometimes I see it again, sometimes it never even crosses my mind again. For example, I posted about an oven, which hasn't crossed my mind since I saw on my blog archive, but deep down I wouldn't ever need it and now I don't think I would want it. On the other hand my recent post, Potty Training, is constantly there, it's like the balloon never floated away. (side note: Reed is urine trained, which is HUGE in my book, and we are now working on getting him to poop.)



Lately, I have been wishing that I didn't have carpet in my dining room, and how much I loathe carpet. I am grateful to even have a home as nice as mine, and know that there are many in the world, let alone my own country, that don't have a home. I have been trying to find the positives in having carpet like if my 22 months old falls down, it cushions her fall, or how much nicer it is to lay down on it than the hardwood floor. That's about where it stops though. The thoughts of how much easier it would be to clean up spills seems to fight it's way to the forefront of my mind.
Maybe by tying this wish to a balloon I will be able to release it. My wishes are just that wishes, not true wants or even needs.

Potty Training

So I have a three year old son, who like most boys at this age has no interest whatsoever in toilet training. I just wish he would have an interest, or I could find his motivator. I know it will happen when he is ready, but I just wish it was sooner rather than later. It appears that his sister who is 18 months will train before he will.

Just a fleeting wish....To think I went from I wish he would sleep at night when he was a baby to now I wish he would use the toilet. There are days I wish we could go back to the beginning.

Support System

I was emailing back and forth with a family member, and through the conversation, I wish it was easier for my husband and I to have more of a support system. I currently pay for babysitting, and I think a handful of times I have had someone to watch my children free of charge. I don't really feel like there is anyone in our lives, even family that I feel like I could rely on if something dire happened. I don't even have anyone besides my husband to confide in, that is partly my own problem as I have trust issues with people. When I do open up to people, I feel I get put down, unvalidated, or they use that information against me. I close up real quick, real tight, and keep people at arm's length. I recently opened up to a family member, and it bit me right in the keester, so back to arm's length and superficiality I will go.

The sad thing is I have become so independent that I actually don't make it known when I do need help. I have gotten accustomed to taking care everything myself, whether it be going to the doctor with my children in tow to needing to go to the store at 11 pm because I have a sick child and need medicine for them.

I wish I could feel comfortable opening up to people, and had more of a support system around me. I do envy, yet admire those who are able to create such a tight knit social network.

A Clean House

I wish for......A clean house. According to this then my wish would also lead to a wasted life, but I just generally wish for a uncluttered house.

I was so embarrassed last week when my in-laws came to visit with their 3 girls, and how messy our house was. This is a constant struggle for me, and I cannot bring myself to hire a cleaning lady. I am working hard on paring down our personal possessions greatly- we sold a pool table on Craig's List, as well as our baby swing.

Woohoo for Craig's List. Now where is my magic wand to wish the mess away, and so my life isn't wasted either.

La Cornue Stove and Oven

Oh a girl can dream right? I saw this beauty of an oven recently, and love the look of it. I am not in the market for a new stove and oven, as my 2001 white Whirlpool Super Capacity 465 works just fine.

If I were to build my absolute dream house, that unattainable house that you know you would never spend THAT much money to build as it would go against your financial morals and principles. This beauty costs........... $7000. I could buy a car with that money, but I will sigh, close my eyes and dream.

Just so you know it's just not some pretty appliance, this oven has three 12,000 BTU burners, one 17,500 BTU center burner, one simmer burner adjustable from 600 BTU to 6,000 BTU, as well as a electric convection oven that has seven functions, including convection and conventional baking/roasting options as well as broiling and defrosting.

I wish....to go back.

I could freeze time, and be able to go back to a specific moment in time. I would go back to this moment, this very first moment of us being man and wife, sealed for time and all eternity where the world was our's for the taking. Everything was fresh and new. To experience that first kiss, that first time together, the first time feeling my heart skipping a beat, the gooey melt chocolate feeling of being in love, the first time of kneeling across the altar looking into each other's eyes where no one else mattered, just us covenanting before God to be sealed for forever, to walk hand in hand and side by side now and always.

I am still in love and always will be with my man. But to jump back in time to have the first feeling. I love this picture and find myself closing my eyes to take myself back there, and I am grateful that I have that memory.

Would I change anything? No, nothing like that at all. I would want to be surrounded by the sights, sounds and smells experienced on that day. I can capture tiny fragments of that picture through various separate moments such as doing sealings with my love, by going on a date and the like, but to experience that photo again will never happen. That was truly a once in a lifetime moment, and that photo is one of my most prized possessions.

Why, oh why a SIXTH blog?

My friends and family probably think I am crazy for starting yet another blog. Heck, they don't have to read it if they don't want to. I think this makes 6 now-

1. Sensational Six: our family blog
2. Political Musings of a Former Semi-Liberal: an outlet for me to rant about politics without having to subject my friends and family to it
3. Cricket's Shelfari: books I've read or currently reading
4. Cricket Creations: I haven't posted any of my crafts recently, although have plans of doing so.
5. A Half Dozen Family Favorites- our favorite recipes
and

6. A Girl Can Wish Can't She: These are things that I see or think "ooo that would be nice." BUT I refuse to pay full price for it money for it or if I can't find a good substitute then I want to save my pretty pennies. Even though I am married to a doctor, we still have a second mortgage called his student loans to pay off, and our current mortgage. We also like to live frugally and save for the future. Again, I don't want to torture my friends and family with the things that I see or I wish for.